Red People Art, by Chad Crouch
Red People Art, by Chad Crouch

Ryan’s prompt was: “A man rummages through the contents of our home and discovers who we are based on its contents.” This is what I wrote:

“This place seems bare,” thought the thief. “I was hoping for more electronics – easy to fence.”

Scouting the living room, he realized, “this furniture is really valuable, possibly even antique, but impossible to move without a van and a crew. These people really value durability, this furniture will be in use long after they are gone.”

Peering closely at the coffee table he thought, “They even made themselves each a personal scrapbook –  not worth my time to look through these.”

“Times a-wasting, better move to the bedroom and look for jewelry. I am betting on a gold watch and maybe some diamonds”, he said to himself. Entering the bedroom, the thief was struck by the window exquisitely framing a view of Mt. Hood. “Wow, this place must have been designed by an architect. Somebody really has an eye for design.”

The thief quickly checked the drawers of the chest-of-drawers and the nightstands. Nothing. The the closets, more drawers. Still nothing. He spies a wooden jewelry box in the bathroom and lifts the lid. Rectangles are sparsely populated with costume jewelry. “Fakes — all fakes”, he thought. The lady of this house is not into jewels nor gold.

Moving to the study, he sees a bookcase. “Hmm, Travel titles, a smattering of self-help and psychology, and a few titles on death and dying. These people are definitely readers, but no valuable originals , signed copies nor antique books here,” he thinks.

Curiously the art on the walls in the house is an odd collection of primitive pieces. Several pieces depict people, children, small animals in active and interactive poses. “Evocative and pleasing, but not worth taking,” he thought. “Calligraphic pieces, perhaps done by the lady of the house,” also not worth stealing.

“This place is a total waste of my valuable time – time to move on,” thought the thief with disgust.